5 Amazing Ways to Initiate Positive Steps
1 Purpose versus Desire
Unfortunately, one of the major problems faced by Ebira youth in Generation Y is their inability to distinguish between purpose and desire as a concept of living. When you know your life purpose, and then you pursue that purpose with all your heart, the things that you desire in life will come to you. If unfortunately, you allow your desire to take the place of your purpose in life, then you can never fulfill the purpose of your existence. Desires are by-products of purpose.
For instance, I’m sure that we all want to be rich. From my experience from my wide interaction with my fellow Ebira youths, I understand that our major quest in life is to become rich. Now, that’s our desire, not our purpose in life; just a financial goal. Anybody who substitutes his purpose in life for his desire to be rich is definitely going to get into any available scheme after the next until he logs into something that seems to yield him money. In most cases, that source of his little earnings may cost him his life in the end.
Even if he earns millions, he may never have enough peace to enjoy the benefits that come with it. In contrast, consider the person who says that he wants to treat sick people. He actually has a purpose that he pursue for a lifetime. You must always remember that purpose cannot be chosen randomly, a life purpose requires that a person should take a look at his inbuilt talents.
If you say that you want to pursue the purpose of treating the sick, are you gifted enough to become a medical doctor? Or is he better in other areas of life? He must be aware that a life purpose is going to involve reliable education and training. Going to school and passing the requirements are actually the basics.
Then finding joy in treating people will be required later. This same life purpose is going to be the factor that will direct such a person towards various places of work for employment. When the satisfaction of life’s purpose begins to dawn on you, then the fulfillment of your desires will almost be at its peak. Then, at this point, the motivation to continue on the path of your purpose will be very strong.
To understand this concept, “ask yourself what is it I enjoy doing without earning a dime?” that thing is your purpose for living. When you take note of such things and you channel your resources and energy towards developing yourself in them, you wouldn’t only be successful, but you would always be willing to do more.
2 Foundation versus Direction
Before you choose your direction in life, be sure of your foundation. The direction and the answers you seek in life should flow from the awareness of who you are.
Your inner self, not outer circumstances should be your guideline on what you may choose to do with your life. Your talents, personal values, life aims, and objectives are fairly comprehensive reflections of who you are. These values, aims, and objectives form the composite of who you are, your inner self. Anytime you are faced with a decision, choice, temptation, or the demand for an opinion, take a look at who you are first.
There is always a conscience in you that acts as a positive direction to you, it makes you feel uneasy whenever you are about to do something that is wrong. That thought that cautions you when a negative option is laid before you is who you are, it’s the real person in you. When certain option conflicts with your value or life purpose, then are sure that it’s not a course worth pursuing in life. Always understand that if you forcefully comply with such an opinion, the consequence may be very difficult.
I am so certain that options such as political thuggery can never “fit” who you are. Forget your present situation in life; every luxury that comes with the option of thuggery is just a temporary pleasure, which may lead to untimely death. When you are asked to learn handicrafts in place of schooling, take time to evaluate the opportunities that may be within it.
Ask yourself if such an opportunity will help you fulfill your purpose in life, will it refine your ideas at the rate that education may do, will it enhance your values or will it be a step that will eventually erode your values at the end? Out of who the winner you truly are, speak to yourself, then do what you know may be best for you.
Make sure that whatever conclusion you will reach stands for something noble in the public eye such that your life may give validity to your days. The major mistake is that they think that their days validate their lives, the very opposite is the truth our lives validate our days. Our lives hold what we value to be our most enduring worth and possibly our highest Purpose for living. Always be aware of your worth, know the real you, live the real you, and begin being before doing.
3 Anger versus Greatness
It’s obvious that the first major obstacle on the path to greatness is anger. Nobody can ever succeed in life unless he learns to control his anger. You will only be able to learn the secrets of greatness when you have learned to control your anger in totality.
While I was growing up, I was always a victim of my anger. Then I was almost always betrayed by my mindset. Every time I was close to victory, my hot-temperedness often ruined it all, and later, I had to go and start all over again.
It’s obvious that the ability to be able to be patient for just five minutes can save you your entire life struggle for living. I know that an average Ebira youth faces a similar problem, it is one of our major weak points in life that we hardly overcome even when we know that it has a negative effect on us. After suffering from my own sense of impatience for many years, and consequently, it had led to so many hurts.
I was a victim of my anger on so many occasions, so one day, I said to myself “this anger must stop if I must do something great, really great with my life”. That day marked the end of my self-destruction. I said to God “I do not know how to get rid of this anger, but I want to, I need to and You are the only one who can help me to”. Guess what? He did actually help me to get totally rid of it in my life.
Now, get this very carefully, in the invisible realm- the realm of God, all things of genuine, positive, and spiritual nature are far more vast and potent than those in our visible world. It is in that invisible realm that we may find all things that we value most. That day, I reached into the invisible world and asked God who giveth all if He wishes, to give me the spirit of forgiveness. I know that as much as I will be prepared to attain success in life.
I will therefore be dealing with more difficult situations and more difficult people in the days ahead. So, I asked for compassion, I also asked for understanding, and most importantly of it all, I asked for wisdom. Since He answered my prayers, I have been in connection with the invisible realm and the visible world in which we simultaneously live.
Fellow brothers and sisters in Ebiraland, I don’t know which religion you may practice, but one thing I am so sure about is that we all serve God in one way or the other and we all believe that He is our ultimate provider. In this sense, try as much as possible to seek these three important things from Him; forgiving spirit, compassion, and wisdom.
These are tangible, invisible “substance” that takes you to your destiny. They help you generate endless ideas, concepts, talents, or inner pulse, or by whatever name you may call them, just be sure that those things are very real, potent, and vital to achieving personal greatness.
The main reason why we get angry is that most of us live self-centered lives. We almost become accustomed to being centered, given attention, and respect. If in any case, something that we have counted on happening doesn’t for any reason, we get upset.
Learning how to apply anger management tips in your daily life does not mean that you will be denying yourself the chance of expressing your feelings. No! On the contrary, you are recognizing it and expressing it, but in words not deeds.
Now, my own hyper-anger has been brought under control as I count the months to years since I began to apply anger management tips. Others may refer to my present person as a state of physical, emotional, and spiritual maturity, all I know for sure is that life has been good and promising being a gentleman.
4 Ethics versus Truth
Situational ethics always act as an obstacle to saying the truth, especially from parents to their children. On my courtesy visit to Mall. S.O. Ibrahim, the CEO of EBICOM news, while we were discussing, he said that the main problem that an average Ebira man has is the inability to be sincere with himself. He said that pride has corrupted the ethics of our forefathers, and it has subsequently been abused by the parents.
Searching through their mind was desperately eager to understand what he really meant and then he eventually cited an example. He asked that “how many fathers have ever admitted openly in the presence of their children that they are failures? They often make us believe that they are successful before we were born”. He said that if a father is a failure, he should be able to admit it to his children.
Every great person seeks to know the truth; the truth about his potential and those that are immediately ahead of him, especially that of his parents. Sincerely, real truth should be the foundation and core on which all ethics are built. Parents should learn to be sincere in their dealings with their children at all times. Without truth, a child can never discover his real person and purpose for living; the true friendship between parents and their children is only built on the platform of truth and sincerity.
Although the truth almost serves as an obstacle to ethics, we can never underestimate the power embedded in saying the truth. Anyone who lives on deceit, pride, and pretense can never achieve genuine success. Parents must learn to leave ethics now and confront their great fear head-on, and tell their children where they have failed in life, so that they may learn.
Now, understand that telling the truth is not telling everything that you know. It is telling your child everything about what he needs to know to get to his best. You must begin to distinguish between ultimate truth and personal opinions. For instance, if a father tells his son that he has been successful and has achieved a lot when all the valuable things in his possession are a house and an old 406 Peugeot, the child’s sense of achievement will limit to what his Father has.
Tell him; instead, You would have done better and he can still do better if he avoids the mistakes that you made in the past. Wherever such mistakes come that led to your failure, be plain to him, it will equip him enough before he grows enough to encounter such problems. Every parent must learn to let truth prevail over ethics if they really have the success of their children at heart and they want them to be greater than they are.
5 Attitude versus Pride
One of the most daring tasks that face Ebira youths is the ability to confront and uproot negative attitudes. Due to our republican nature, it takes more than intentional efforts to overcome pride and say “hey, my life is not only about criticisms. It’s about building positive values and principles and engaging in positive activities that will eventually yield positive results. I need to stop being rude, selfish, hot-tempered, cynical, and critical. I have a higher purpose than that!”
You must learn to re-engineer your speeches; even if you do not feel positive, try and speak positive words to yourself and others around you. Seriously, Ebira youths are mostly faced with the challenges of separating pride from their attitudes and distinguishing positive speeches and the native ones.
We don’t need to Programme ourselves to think and speak negative things always, because when we do, it becomes habitual over time. We need a new orientation to existence, and sanitize our hearts towards a new perception of reasoning. We must learn a new positive form of expressing our thoughts free of hatred and pride.
Our attitudes towards each other must be laid on the foundation of respect for lives and properties, brotherly and unconditional love, and a deep understanding of other people’s intentions. To be able to achieve this, our ears must hear positive words being uttered from our mouths.
When you speak positive words, it triggers positive thoughts and feelings, which in turn will eventually produce a “thought-bank” for producing positive actions. Even if you cannot do away with all your pride, make sure you suppress it to the minimum, this is achievable through a “part will and part idea” concept. When you speak positive words, you will surely be voicing positive ideas.
The attitudes related to positive ideas will eventually flow, and in the end, not only will your attitudes be separated from pride completely, your thoughts will eventually be far from negative things. Our attitude dictates our behaviors. Positive attitudes gradually produce positive behavior, and such is also applicable to negative attitudes. Therefore, the nature of your behaviour (negative or positive) begins with your attitudes.